yawn

soooo tired -.-
but it's odd. we have to build a house in applied engineering (a small one) and I'm like my journal could live in it ^_^
and Ninja said "we could make a little bed for it :)"
not sarcastically or bored or eyerollingly. almost like he appreciates that I'm attached to it and he likes it 2. and I have never met someone like that.
I worry about a couple of things:
1. when I go away....how will I survive?
2. if we don't end up liking each other, I will always compare guys to Ninja. which is not fair to them or me
3. what if we do and have a nasty break up cuz we're too alike
4. what if he grows up? *faints*
but I think I can survive. because Ninja helped me through the summer. he didn't have to be with me. I just thought, Ninja likes me for who I am. the world is stupid. and I survived
maybe I won't have to compare guys to him. it is asking alot to find another person like him. but there are like 6 gazilion people in the world.
and even though I feel like were meant to be, it may not be a good idea. perhaps I need to find my opposite (ah not Squall!!!)
and even if he grows up, I believe he has given me enough memories to last a lifetime.
it helps to know there is someone in the world like you. even if you never see him again